K-pop stan/microexpressions expert who watched every episode of ‘Lie To Me’ proves Billlie’s Tsuki is ‘like totally a bitch, man’

HELL (AP) – An anonymous K-pop stan who has watched every episode of 2009 FOX drama Lie To Me has recently used their expertise in the science* of microexpressions to diagnose popular Billlie member Tsuki with an ailment called Look I Just Don’t Like That Bitch Okay.

The dissertation on Tsuki provides a lot of evidence for their claims, such as “I’m a really big fan of hers too and I’m just super worried that other fans are not educating her on the fact that she’s an annoying shrew“, “the 0.01 seconds she moves her eyes at a 37-degree angle back and to the left indicates that with all due respect she might be the child of Satan“, and “I have a lot of respect for her, but also, I hate her guts and she’s just like IVE‘s Wonyoung, who I also proved was like totally a bitch“.

Asked for comment by Asian Junkie on the stan’s findings, a psychologist who works as a body language expert said of the allegations, “This is the 10th time you’ve called today, if you don’t fuck off with this nonsense I’m calling the cops.” When these remarks were relayed to the stan, they responded, “Uh okay, but psychology has done like problematic things in the past millennias or whatever, so that automatically makes me right.

In completely unrelated news, a popular translation blog has changed their mission statement from “interpret the mess” to “make the mess”.

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